Should My Brother Quit Driving?


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My brother (27) learnt driving under an instructor for 10 days in May 2023. We had no car at that time. In August 2023, we purchased a car. That means he wasn't driving since May 2023. After we got a car, he was too terrible with the car initially. He dented the car several times in September 2023.

As of now, his driving skills has improved but he still he keeps on making several mistakes. Yesterday, half of the car's wheels submerged went into pond like gutter (which was on the corner of the road) while giving space to the incoming truck coming from back. Finally, a crane arrived and helped our car to come out.

These are the things where he struggles at :

1. He finds it really hard to park the car parallelly when there are vehicles parked around. We don't have parking space, so he has to park outside the home. There are two scooties parked near to our car.

2. He struggles in narrow roads. The road in our area is narrow as trucks eat up a lot of space. When some vehicles from opposite comes and there is less space, he finds it difficult to pass. He doesn't wants to ram his car into the corner but he doesn't wants to hit the opposite vehicle. In such kind of roads, when there are cyclists in front, he just pauses instead of overtaking just because he doesn't wants to hit them. Other drivers easily sneak in and overtake the slow moving cyclist in a narrow road.

3. Stray cows and dogs make him sweat. Cows often suddenly come into the middle of the road. My brother gets confused what to do. He just pauses his vehicle and his reaction time is not good. Other drivers smoothly pass the cow.

4. He is so confused about lanes. When he drives at the right side of the lane, I fear that he may hit the divider. In right side of lane, there are cars moving at 60-70km but he drives at 30-40km. This is where he faces difficulty. He says fast moving cars behind him get troubled and start honking. In the left lane, there are e-rickshaws and cyclists who move very slow. He also feels uncomfortable in that lane too.

5. He cannot take U-turn properly in a divider road. He drove in main roads with divider 5-6 times since we purchased the car. One day, he took a long time to take u-turn which blocked the whole traffic. The next time he shifted his car to left corner of the road to take a proper cut to take u turn while others take u turn while sticking to divider lane. The other time he once took u turn in 2nd gear.

6. His car often gets stalled/stopped when he starts to drive after stopping the car for a moment

Atleast he knows to drive much better than me. He might be having poor coordination, poor spatial awareness, back judgement, poor reflexes and poor reaction time. We don't want another horrific incident.
 

Nairrk

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My brother (27) learnt driving under an instructor for 10 days in May 2023.
These are the things where he struggles at :
From what you explained above, I feel your brother still need more professional training - how to drive a car in busy roads/highways and how he can control any situation on the road/off-road.

I remember, those days the driving training classes last for 30 days (30 minutes daily basis) which included a couple of days highway/traffic driving. With the instructor sitting next to us, we simply not to worry much about the traffic or road situation and get some confidence before we ready to go alone on the road.

Let your brother take more driving practise under the guidance of an experienced driver or instructor and sure he will get more confidence in driving at all surfaces.
 
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From what you explained above, I feel your brother still need more professional training - how to drive a car in busy roads/highways and how he can control any situation on the road/off-road.

I remember, those days the driving training classes last for 30 days (30 minutes daily basis) which included a couple of days highway/traffic driving. With the instructor sitting next to us, we simply not to worry much about the traffic or road situation and get some confidence before we ready to go alone on the road.

Let your brother take more driving practise under the guidance of an experienced driver or instructor and sure he will get more confidence in driving at all surfaces.
Instructor will charge 5000 rupees for 10 days. It will cost us a lot. He argues that if he doesn't drive in very challenging conditions, he won't be able to learn.
 
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I understand your brother's perspective but those tricky conditions really seem to be overwhelming him right now. Maybe he could focus more learning the basics in less busy areas first, until he gains more confidence. His safety and others' is most important. Maybe discuss lowering the risk slowly, like practicing parking alone first. He'll improve with time, as long as he stays safe going at his own pace.
 
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Instructor will charge 5000 rupees for 10 days. It will cost us a lot. He argues that if he doesn't drive in very challenging conditions, he won't be able to learn.
Hi, has your brother got a full driving licence ? Does he drive on his own with no one else in the car ? I don't think he has had enough training or experience. He lacks confidence and some of the basic skills that are essential. Practice, practice and practice is what he needs. Accompanied by an appropriate skilled passenger to instruct him.
 
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Hi, has your brother got a full driving licence ? Does he drive on his own with no one else in the car ? I don't think he has had enough training or experience. He lacks confidence and some of the basic skills that are essential. Practice, practice and practice is what he needs. Accompanied by an appropriate skilled passenger to instruct him.
No, he only has learning license. He drives on his own and I am the one who is always with him in car. I also learnt driving but I know much less than him. I can only show concern. I don't know how to advice him when he drives.

Yes, he says that the more you drive the more your skills will improve. I will feel anxious if he tries to drive in more difficult conditions. I fear car may dent again. The fear of denting car is the reason why he doesn't practice much.

I don't know anyone whom I can hire to instruct my brother. If we again hire driving tutor, he will charge a lot of money. None of my parents know driving.
 
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He needs to do the following to be able to drive properly.

1. He needs to stick to 40kmph at all times when going on road.
2. He needs to drive 10 kms a day when the traffic is at it lowest, preferably early in the morning.
3. He needs to keep two buckets one on top of other and repeatedly try to turn or back off close to it and get down to check the actual space left to compare it with the space he thought he had. This has tobe do ne in a secluded space.

He will pick up in a month.
 
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He needs to do the following to be able to drive properly.

1. He needs to stick to 40kmph at all times when going on road.
2. He needs to drive 10 kms a day when the traffic is at it lowest, preferably early in the morning.
3. He needs to keep two buckets one on top of other and repeatedly try to turn or back off close to it and get down to check the actual space left to compare it with the space he thought he had. This has tobe do ne in a secluded space.

He will pick up in a month.
The roads nearby our home are difficult. If he drives at 40km, cars running 60-70km behind us will trouble. Driving 10kms a day will cost a lot of petrol considering the mileage of car is 14-15km/litre
 
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No, he only has learning license. He drives on his own and I am the one who is always with him in car. I also learnt driving but I know much less than him. I can only show concern. I don't know how to advice him when he drives.

Yes, he says that the more you drive the more your skills will improve. I will feel anxious if he tries to drive in more difficult conditions. I fear car may dent again. The fear of denting car is the reason why he doesn't practice much.

I don't know anyone whom I can hire to instruct my brother. If we again hire driving tutor, he will charge a lot of money. None of my parents know driving.
Hi,
Please clarify your answer. You say "he drives on his own" and "I am the one who is always in the car" Do you have a full driving licence or learners licence ? Does the car have "L" plates when your brother is driving ? Do you have insurance ?
Regards Neil
 
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The roads nearby our home are difficult. If he drives at 40km, cars running 60-70km behind us will trouble. Driving 10kms a day will cost a lot of petrol considering the mileage of car is 14-15km/litre
If you need to drive without incident, you need to spend 2-3k in petrol.
 
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Hi,
Please clarify your answer. You say "he drives on his own" and "I am the one who is always in the car" Do you have a full driving licence or learners licence ? Does the car have "L" plates when your brother is driving ? Do you have insurance ?
Regards Neil
I only show concern and tell him if there are any obstacles around. Forget DL, I don't even have LL. No, our car doesn't have L plates. Yes, we have insurance of 2-3k rupees from ICICI Lombard.
 

Nairrk

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Instructor will charge 5000 rupees for 10 days. It will cost us a lot. He argues that if he doesn't drive in very challenging conditions, he won't be able to learn.
If you want to learn properly you need someone to guide /teach him proper driving and how to negotiate under traffic / difficult conditions

No, he only has learning license. He drives on his own and I am the one who is always with him in car. I also learnt driving but I know much less than him. I can only show concern. I don't know how to advice him when he drives.
No use. The person sitting beside the new driver or who try to teach driving should be an expert in driving and having knowledge about highway driving. You yourselves not a driver and what's the point sitting next to him - it will make more tension for both of you.

Yes, he says that the more you drive the more your skills will improve. I will feel anxious if he tries to drive in more difficult conditions. I fear car may dent again. The fear of denting car is the reason why he doesn't practice much.
Most of us all learnt to drive by taking some pain, and of course some minor dents were always there. You should not worry about such things, and if you have it in mind, then you will find it difficult to get confidence in difficult conditions.

I don't know anyone whom I can hire to instruct my brother. If we again hire driving tutor, he will charge a lot of money. None of my parents know driving.
Driving 10kms a day will cost a lot of petrol considering the mileage of car is 14-15km/litre
You have a car. You want your brother learn skillfull driving but do not want to spend any money neither to pay for the instructor nor petrol expenses etc.?

I only show concern and tell him if there are any obstacles around. Forget DL, I don't even have LL. No, our car doesn't have L plates. Yes, we have insurance of 2-3k rupees from ICICI Lombard.
This is the joke of the full story - You are the one sitting with him but you don't know proper driving or even have no L/L. Your brother got only an L/L. And your car does not have L sticker.
You are making a big mistake roaming around with the car. As per rule, a person who has got L/L can drive a car only with the driving instructor or someone who has a valid D/L along with him - you will not get any insurance coverage if your brother happened to hit the car against another vehicle or even to public property. It is a crime also.

I don't want to discourage you - but what you and your brother doing/practising are not correct.
//
 
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If you want to learn properly you need someone to guide /teach him proper driving and how to negotiate under traffic / difficult conditions

No use. The person sitting beside the new driver or who try to teach driving should be an expert in driving and having knowledge about highway driving. You yourselves not a driver and what's the point sitting next to him - it will make more tension for both of you.

Most of us all learnt to drive by taking some pain, and of course some minor dents were always there. You should not worry about such things, and if you have it in mind, then you will find it difficult to get confidence in difficult conditions.

You have a car. You want your brother learn skillfull driving but do not want to spend any money neither to pay for the instructor nor petrol expenses etc.?

This is the joke of the full story - You are the one sitting with him but you don't know proper driving or even have no L/L. Your brother got only an L/L. And your car does not have L sticker.
You are making a big mistake roaming around with the car. As per rule, a person who has got L/L can drive a car only with the driving instructor or someone who has a valid D/L along with him - you will not get any insurance coverage if your brother happened to hit the car against another vehicle or even to public property. It is a crime also.

I don't want to discourage you - but what you and your brother doing/practising are not correct.
//
Petrol is 96.55 litre in my city. Car mileage is also not good (14-15). Our car is just 2.5 lakh. We are not financially so well.

Regarding L sticker, he never drove in roads where there is police. He only drives around the road near our home. Let's say, whenever he drives, he drives not beyond 3-4km.

My brother did learnt under an instructor for 10 days but we didn't had a car at that time. After 3 months, we got the car. He could have lost his reflexes in these 3 months.

Hi,
I agree. I can no longer take this conversation seriously. The questions and answers are comical and don't make any sense at all. Can own and run a car but cannot afford 65 rupees per day to drive 10km, really.
I have no further comments as I think the whole think is a joke.
I live in Lucknow. He petrol is 96.55. Plus, we are not financially so well. Our car is just 2.5 lakh. We purchased car for two reasons. One reason is that public transport is harder to get in our area and there are very less amenities here like good shops, doctor, medical store, restaurant etc. Before buying car, we had to walk 1.5km to access a public transport. Second reason is we also have a dog. We cannot travel with him and someone has to stay at home to look after the dog. It is very difficult to find an auto/ola/uber who can accept my dog. By having a car, we can take our dog without any hassle.
 
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I live in Lucknow. He petrol is 96.55. Plus, we are not financially so well. Our car is just 2.5 lakh. We purchased car for two reasons. One reason is that public transport is harder to get in our area and there are very less amenities here like good shops, doctor, medical store, restaurant etc. Before buying car, we had to walk 1.5km to access a public transport. Second reason is we also have a dog. We cannot travel with him and someone has to stay at home to look after the dog. It is very difficult to find an auto/ola/uber who can accept my dog. By having a car, we can take our dog without any hassle.
You have asked for advise and have got enough, but not ready to listen.
The whole Thread is a joke...... (May be you want to hear from others that you Brother must stop driving)
 
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